这段英语作文有什么需要改动的地方

发布时间: 2023-02-03 16:00:14 来源: 励志妙语 栏目: 作文 点击: 96

请大神指点一下这篇考研英语作文还有什么可以改进的地方?The,boy,in,the,left,picture,is,reluct...

这段英语作文有什么需要改动的地方

请大神指点一下这篇考研英语作文还有什么可以改进的地方?

The boy in the left picture is reluctant to study as his dad is watching television, which is actually the epitome of the majority of domesticity. Whereas both the kid and his father in the other drawing, standing in stark contrast to the former, devote themselves to learning diligently.

Plain as it looks, the cartoon vividly offers a thought provoking comparison between two divergent parental styles, and strongly advocates that, compared to just verbal education, a good example is more acceptable for children. Thus an in-depth question is raised: Why are behaviors more persuasive for children than talking? Countless factors may account for this issue, but it is the primary cause and the underlying cause that the link between deeds and results is more perceptible than that of words and results, especially for kids with little cognition.

From what has been concisely discussed, we may reasonably conclude that positive behaviors of parents do perform a vital role in their offspring's formative years and will eventually build them a rosy future.

首先,我认为你这个字句过于简单了。其实结构归于单调,并且基础没有高级的词汇。然后整体的篇章结构分段不是特别的完整。

大虾帮我改一下这篇英语作文(初一水平)

老师让我们写那啥“我运动,我健康,我快乐”。在这里胡写了一段,明天就交(初一水平的)。帮我改改噻!不管是从语法上还是作文上,改得越尽善尽美就行!rnI feel so happy when I do sportsrn Every one has his own way of resting.Maybe the most popular way is to play a lot of sports.I like playing sports very much.It helps me to be strong.rn I like swimming.My sister does,too.We often go swim once a week in the summer.I think swim is very interesting.The wather is clean and warm.While swimming, I feeling I am flying in the sky!My sister likes to play sports outside,so swim is her favorite sport.rn Swim is good for us.Beacuse we must exercise our arms and legs to swim.A swimming a week keeps doctor sway.rn How about you?What kind of sports do you like? rn特别是语法不通的,各位别留情
I feel very happy when I do sports
Every one has his own way of resting.Maybe the most popular way is to do some sports.I like to do exercises very much.It helps me to be strong.
I like swimming.So does my sister.We often go to swim once a week in summer.I think swim is very interesting.The water is clean and warm.While swimming, I feel I am flying in the sky!My sister likes to do outdoor sports,so swim is her favorite sport.
Swim is good for us beacuse we can strengthen our arms and legs.A swimming a week keeps doctor away.
How about you?What kind of sports do you like?
I feel so happy when I do sports
I am happy when I am doing sports.

Every one has his own way of resting.
We relax in different ways.

Maybe the most popular way is to play a lot of sports.
Perhaps, Doing sports is the most popular one.

I like playing sports very much.
I like doing sports very much.

It helps me to be strong.
, which helps me grow stronger.

I like swimming.
My sister does,too.
So does my sister.

We often go swim once a week in the summer.
We often go swimming together every week in the summer.

I think swim is very interesting.
I think swimming is very interesting.

The wather is clean and warm.
It is very clear and warm.

While swimming, I feeling I am flying in the sky!
I felt as if I was flying in the sky when swimming!

My sister likes to play sports outside,so swim is her favorite sport.
My sister likes exercising in the open air, but swimming is her favorite.

Swim is good for us.
Swimming does good to us.

Beacuse we must exercise our arms and legs to swim.
Because it makes our arms and legs stronger.

A swimming a week keeps doctor sway.
" Swimming weekly keeps doctor away."

How about you?What kind of sports do you like?
when I am doing sports
play a lot kinds of sports
It help me be strong
So does my sister. We go swimming once a week in summer. I think swimming ^^
I feel myself flying in the sky
My sister likes playing sports outside,so swimming ^^
Swimming is good^ Because we can exercise our arms and legs by swimming
Swimming once a week^^

这是我修改的地方
以后多交流~

大学校园有哪些地方需要改善 英语作文

写2~3点需要改善的地方, 例如食堂、安全等方面,字数150左右。谢谢。
食堂卫生和打饭的秩序都需要改善……宿舍的用电安全应该注意,别违规使用电器……按时回宿舍,不要在校外游荡……

译文:The dining room health and dozen rice order all need to improve...... The power of the dormitory security should pay attention to, don't violate compasses electrical appliances in the... Back to the dorm on time, don't wander outside...
英文作文?难道要改美国大学校园吗?哪个州的!
如果不知那些需要改善的地方,不如与同学老师们商量如何。

请大家帮忙修改一下这篇英语作文

这是一篇四级考的作文,文章要求是写一篇竞选学生会主席的发言稿 Good morning teachers and students, it’s an honor for me to deliver my campaign speech here. What comes first is that I have a good ability to be in charge of a union. Besides, I’m good at organizing, which I believe is essential for chairman of the student union. What’s more, I’m always full of energy. Thus, I hold the belief that I can add to an energetic atmosphere in the student union if I am elected. When it comes to what I’ll do if I am elected, I have several plans. First of all, I’m going to hold several art festivals, during which every student can show his/her best art woks to all the students. In addition, I will modify several school rules in order to make then more suitable for our school. Last but not least, I will put a suggestion box in order to improve the work of the student union. In a word, I believe I can be a good chairman of the student union, please vote for me. Thank you. 有劳大家指出其中的语法错误及不够地道的地方,谢谢了 (回答的好可以追加分数)
我把改过的文章写上了,
你自己看一下吧,我就不作解释了.
可能有的地方你认为可以不改,
你可以根据个人习惯做一些改动.
我把你的有问题的地方改正了,并且逻辑上有一定调整,还有用词.
当然,只是作为参考.
Good
morning
everyone.
It's
my
great
honor
to
give
my
campaign
speech
here.
First
of
all,
I'd
like
to
say
not
only
am
I
strong
in
charge
of
a
union,
I
am
also
good
at
organizing
and
this
is
an
essential
character
for
the
chairman
of
the
student
union.
Additionally,
as
an
energetic
person,
I
am
totally
convinced
that
I
can
create
a
live
atmosphere
in
the
student
union
if
I
will
be
elected.
Imagine
that
I
were
successful,
I
already
have
a
list
of
plans.
To
begin
with,
I
am
going
to
hold
several
art
festivals
in
which
each
student
can
show
his
or
her
best
art
creations
to
others.
What
follows
is
that
I
will
modify
several
school
rules
in
order
to
make
them
more
applicapable
to
our
school.
Last
but
not
least,
I
will
set
up
a
suggestion
box
so
that
it
improves
the
work
of
the
student
union.
In
summary,
I
trust
I
can
be
an
eligible
chairman
of
the
student
union,
so
please
vote
for
me.
Thank
you
so
much.

请帮我看下这篇英语作文,哪里能修改哪里能改进。谢谢!

图片大概就是一堆人围在桌子上,年青一代都拿着手机,平板之类的,爷爷奶奶都很不开心的样子

作文是:

    The picture is show that in ahome’s dinner, all the family sitting around the desk, although the has lots offood on desk, the people who is teenage all play the telephone, including thelittle boy, there are happy when they watch the screen. On the contrary, the grandfatherand grandmother are unhappy.

    I am guilt when I see this picture because sometimes,I play the telephone in the dinner, too. But it is wrong, I think. A gooddinner is family talking each other. And all the family are happy. Although thetechnologic make some good effective to our live, a coin has two sides. Some disadvantageis derive from technologic because the use is untrue. First of all, I think thetechnologic is really good for us, making our live convenience. Then, if usethe technologic untrue will lead to some bad result, biggest like the war or smallestlike the picture show. Finally, I suggest that people should ride out thevirtual when do something like make a dinner, talking about the parents is agood choose.

    All in all, in my opinion ,use the technologic true will make ourworld flowers blooming like a piece of brocade.

The picture is show 有语法问题,改成:The picture shows

Home's dinner改成:family dinner

all the family sitting around the desk 却动词,另外吃饭用的桌子一般用table. 所以改成:all the family members are sitting around the table

although the has 改成:although there is a lot of food o the table.

直接说:all the tennage are playing the cell phones.

There are happy when they watch the screen---they are

I am guilt----I feel guilty

I play the ---I also play the telephone at dinner

a good dinner is...-----------A good dinner atmosphere shall be all the family members talking to each other and all of them should be happy.

 

太多要改的了。

the picture shows...

all the family members are sitting around the desk

although there are so many kinds of food in the table

teenagers are all playing the telephone

they look happy when they are playing it

the grandparents

i feel guilty when i...

i play ....during the dinner

a good dinner is every members in the family talk to each other.

making our life be more interesting

then, if someone use the ...untrue

I suggest that people should ride out thevirtual when they are doing something like making a dinner

talking to parents

能选我的为最佳答案吗? 我有个很急的问题要问,但没分了!!!

你的图片我看着不是很清楚呢,简单的说一下吧.
First,in the beginning of your writting,you can describe something about the current about the eletronic product development.In the second part,as the picture showing , describe as detailed as you can .
Next,Remember summarize an idea in your opinon including the effect of the situation.
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